I will never forget the joy of taking my son, Josh, to hockey games when he was a kid. We would show up to the arena midway through the second period, when the scalpers were letting tickets go for cheap. Josh didn’t care that we were arriving late. His eyes would light up the second we could hear the sounds of the puck and the roar of the crowd. I used to imagine that one day we’d take his kids to games. It would be a family tradition.
But life doesn’t always go according to plan. My son grew up, got married, and had two wonderful sons. Each step of the way made me happier than I could ever tell you. But things took a turn. Josh lost his job, his wife left him and the kids, and he started to drink more and more. My wife and I knew how much he was struggling, and we tried to accommodate him as best we could. Eventually, the kids -- now 9 and 7 -- moved in with us.
My wife and I were at a complete loss. We knew we needed help, but where would we even start? With Josh? With his kids? Were we doing something wrong?
I like to tell people that I’m not terrible at the computer for someone my age. After searching on Google, I was able to find Lifeline. After explaining our situation to them, hoping they could help us figure out what to do, we were astonished to learn that they wanted to bring our whole family in. We would get to talk to a Family Counsellor regarding our son, and a Parent Coach regarding our grandsons. Our grandkids were immediately set up with a Youth Counsellor. And eventually, we were able to get Josh to call in and see an Addiction Counsellor. They call it the Comprehensive Family Care program, and it was offered to us 100% free of charge.
It would be incredible enough if that were the extent of it, but at Lifeline all of our respective counsellors worked together to create a coherent treatment plan for our entire family. It set a tone that helped dispel the tension and confusion we’d been feeling: we felt like we were all on the same team, all working toward the same goal.
It wasn’t easy at first. When we first brought my grandkids into the program, I was overwhelmed. I was trying to balance my own health issues, the responsibilities of taking care of two energetic kids, and the constant worry about my son. The kids had their own struggles, too. They were confused, scared, and acting out in ways my wife and I couldn’t always understand. I cannot imagine how we would have gotten through it on our own.
After several months, I’m seeing positive changes in my son and in my grandkids. And life feels manageable again for me and my wife, which is something we are learning to prioritize in all this. Even in my darkest days, I still held onto that image in my mind of me and Josh taking the kids to games, clinging to the dream of a family tradition even as our family was falling apart. Now, I feel so much closer to that dream coming true, and I have everyone at Lifeline to thank.
*Names and details have been changed to protect the anonymity of those involved, as the story was adapted after being told to a Lifeline staff member with permission to share. Additionally, we would note that the reason we were able to attend to Graham and his family immediately is because we are regularly expanding our staff in order to meet the growing demand for our services. As Chabad Lifeline is sustained through private donations, this entails significant fundraising efforts. Making a donation can help ensure that we can continue to provide timely care that can ultimately save a life or set a family on a better course, creating a positive ripple effect on future generations.
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