I am a recovering sex addict. And it’s very possible that I wouldn’t even know I had a problem if my wife hadn't found the courage to tell me.
Out of respect for my wife, I will not go into too many graphic details. Suffice it to say that because of my inability to connect with her on an emotional level, our sex life had nothing to do with love. I think it speaks to the severity of my problem that I didn’t truly understand how bad things had become.
In effect, I was using my wife as a prop. I was behaving as though she were only there physically, not emotionally. But she was there emotionally, and the accumulation of these degrading experiences was devastating to her. One night, she finally summoned the strength to tell me what I was doing to her. I will never forget how desperate, sad, and alone she looked in that moment. I knew I needed to get help immediately. A friend in our community recommended Chabad Lifeline. He described it as a place where sex addiction is treated with compassion and non-judgment, and those afflicted can begin to reclaim their lives and rebuild their connection to their partners. My wife is also receiving counselling at Lifeline to help her deal with the trauma and fully recognize that the situation was in no way her fault. I realize there is still a lot of work left to do to repair my marriage and regain my wife’s trust, but I am committed to my recovery, and they offer support and guidance every step of the way. *Names and details have been changed to protect the anonymity of those involved. Additionally, we would note that the reason we were able to attend to Brian immediately is because we are regularly expanding our staff in order to meet the growing demand for our services. As Chabad Lifeline is sustained through private donations, this entails significant fundraising efforts. Making a donation can help ensure that we can continue to provide timely care that can ultimately save a life or set a family on a better course, creating a positive ripple effect on future generations.
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